Danger Writ Large

Why the Confirmation of Amy Coney Barrett Terrifies Me

I have friends who, in 2016, could not fathom why I was worried.

“Don’t be silly,” they said. “Nothing bad will happen.”

One friend, a dear one who happens to be deeply conservative, and I had dinner shortly after the election. I specifically asked her if we could meet, because I wanted to ask for her support. I wanted to make sure that if my needs, my life, my welfare, were threatened, I could count on her to put our friendship above politics and use her voice to protect me.

When I asked, shaking as I did, feeling my stomach turn and tears rise to my eyes, I couldn’t help but wonder if this was what it felt like when Jews turned to their friends in Germany to ask for help. Her reply made me then wonder how those Jews felt when their friends, essentially, let them down.

She started with a look of shock and a rapidly uttered promise that “of course” she would, but then she added, “I know how you feel. I felt that way when Obama was elected.

Um. What?

Look. I’m aware there are plenty of people who disagreed with President Barak Obama’s politics. Heck pretty much every President can be guaranteed that folks will disagree with them. But to say that the election of Barak Obama in any way shape or form represented the level of threat to the LGBTQ community (not to mention communities of color, women etc…) that has been seen in the last 4 years is a belief saturated in delusion and denial. Statistics show a tectonic shift in hate crimes — spiking on a year over year basis. A President who on myriad occasions flashes the White Power hand signal while on national television. I could go on, but extolling the horror that is the current Administration isn’t the purpose of this.

This is about people who, from positions of privilege and ignorance make statements that are utterly galling.

I’d like to say this friend was the only one. She was not.

Many others demurred softly, made comforting sounds and said, “You’re overreacting. It’s going to be fine. He’s not nearly as bad as you think.”

I knew they were wrong.

Four years later and it turns out they were wrong.

It’s not just about the man who presently resides at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. He’s just a symptom. A galling and awful symptom, mind you, but a symptom. No. That man represents a much deeper disgrace and danger — a Republican party that saw this laughable clown as the perfect puppet, someone they could leverage to do precisely what they wanted — which was to gain more influence for themselves.

No matter what happens next Tuesday, the devastation wrought by the disgrace that is Mitch McConnell and the spineless Republicans who have allowed the exploitation and bastardization of their party, a lack of action driven by nothing other than their utter narcissistic sense of self-preservation, enabling the steam rolling of a Judicial appointment to the Highest Court in this land — is something we will suffer through for decades to come.

To those friends who have kids who are gay, might be gay or one day turn out to be gay … know that decisions you’ve made to let things slide now put them in peril. Oh, and for those with daughters, congratulations. You’ve just screwed them too.

Now the post that my friend Jon shared. I do not know its provenance so cannot attribute it formally.

Many people don’t realize that it was still a felony to be gay in America less than 20 years ago. In 2003, a Supreme Court case struck down the remaining sodomy laws in 13 states after police in Texas raided the home of a gay man and dragged he and another man out in handcuffs. As horrific as that sounds, three members of the court voted that they saw nothing wrong with putting people in prison because they’re gay.

One of those justices is still on the court and swore in Amy Coney Barrett at her request.

The person she described as her mentor and extremely close to her ideologically is the other justice who argued vehemently that every gay person you know should remain felons.

If you don’t quite understand why your gay friends and family are terrified right now, that might give you a slight glimpse into our lives and what is going through our heads as she is sworn in.